Memories.

Last night, as I lay in bed, twisting and turning, there being no sign of sleep, my brain couldn't help but explore unchartered territories and I soon began to overthink.

The main idea of my desolate thoughts was that nothing lasts forever and everything has to come to an end. The coffee you're drinking right now, the couch you're lazily sprawled across or the phone you're reading this on are all ticking time bombs. They come with an expiry date.

Heck, forget these materialistic things, even we, humans, come with an expiry date. Everything around us that we see, touch or feel is temporary.

They say that humans are social animals so it is almost inevitable for us to make friends but what is the point of these friendships if they won't last? What's the point of getting into a relationship, knowing that everything is going to blow up into your face and soon all hell will break lose? What's the point of investing so much time and emotions in connections that are temporary?

We came into this world alone and we sure as hell will be leaving this world alone. So why can't we live in this world alone?

As an extrovert, I used to absolutely dread the idea of being alone. I didn't like being alone with my own head because my thoughts scared me. I needed someone around me all the time. If I wasn't hanging out with my friends, I would make sure I was either texting or calling someone or the other because I was frightened of being alone. I was frightened of confronting my thoughts. (and truth be told, I also found it to be boring)

But during this lockdown, when I had no choice but to live with myself, my past traumas and grief, I faced my fears and it dawned on me that I was never afraid to be alone, I was just afraid of being lonely. This lockdown made me realize that I wasn't such a bad company and I could probably survive alone.

I make the idea of flying solo sound eccentric right? I mean, other than the benefits of introspection, finding who you are and everything, the issue with forming bonds with other people is that they break. People leave, either by choice or due to certain situations.

Why do we make friends then? Why do we attach ourselves to people knowing fully well how it's going to end up? Why do we set ourselves up for heartbreak?

The answer is simple.

Yes, we have to take the journey of life alone. We have to face our struggles by ourselves and no one can deal with our problems if not us and there is no escaping anything.

But, good friends make this journey so much easier. Knowing someone is there to hear you rant about how shitty your day has been makes your day better, if not much then at least by 10x. Knowing someone who'll be there for you at 2am when you hate the world and everything in it and also at 3 am when you want to dance on your rooftop, because the weather seems pleasant.

Everyone has the power to survive alone but the thing about friends is, they make everything better. They will help you achieve your dreams, the ones you dream while sleeping and also the ones that don't let you sleep at night. Your friends give you the confidence that you never really knew you had. Well, at least mine do.

Sure, nothing lasts forever but it is the memories you make with the people you love that matter.